I think I wrote a post on my phone at 4w1d, but now for the life of me cant find it. :(
Anyway, things are going well. I still cant believe that we have known for 2 weeks! Its flying by. I had my first bloodwork drawn last week and have to go get the results sometime this week. I have booked a prenatal appointment with Dr.Edwards for May 14th, so I think Ill get all the history and measurements taken then. Im a bit worried about her. From what I have seen professionally, she isnt the most friendly lady in the world but since she is the "Baby doctor" in High Prairie, I guess shes the go to Doc. I have to get an internal done, which Im not looking forward to at all. I was a bit sad to hear that they only start doing ultrasounds at 20 weeks here! Thats so long!! Im going to see if I can get one earlier then that. I mean, waiting till its half over is a bit crazy. I have another appt with the Doc on Friday so maybe I can convince him then!!
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
3+5- March 28th
I am still peeing on things.
I have a problem. I know that I do. I am so excited to see lines and YES on the tests that I cant help myself. I am almost out of ICs and I thought 'Hmm, I should order some more'. Im not really sure that it makes any sense at all to order more pregnancy tests when I am already pregnant and KNOW I am. :)
The lines are getting nice and dark on the ICs too so that makes me feel better.
Last nights shift went pretty well. I dont feel too tired yet. Im not too hungry or feeling sick either. Fingers Crossed that that stays away for a while.
I talked to Dr. Shepershad yesterday in Emerg and asked if he was taking Pts, and he told me yes to just call and make an appt at the office. [img]http://emoticons4u.com/happy/050.gif[/img]
Im happy to be able to choose the doc that I can see and I hope that he will follow me through my pregnancy since I think that he will be easier to persuade into letting me deliver in B.C. and letting me stay on car longer.
Monday, March 26, 2012
WE ARE PREGNANT!!!! 3w4d
I have been getting some faint faint lines on my IC tests since 8 DPO. The kind of lines that you have to twist and turn the test and look at it in the right light and squint. But today I got a pretty dark line on them so I thought that I would take an Equate blue dye, even though I know they are terrible for evap lines. It came back suspiciously positive looking... Soooooo, I took a First Response Digital test.
YES YES YES YES YES!!
No doubt about it now. Looks like we made a Birthday baby and Matt with get his Christmas gift!! lol Should be an interesting year. Its just in time to have a Dragon baby too!
December 8th is my EDD!!
YES YES YES YES YES!!
No doubt about it now. Looks like we made a Birthday baby and Matt with get his Christmas gift!! lol Should be an interesting year. Its just in time to have a Dragon baby too!
December 8th is my EDD!!
Thursday, March 22, 2012
7 DPO- March 22nd
So for the last few days I have been an emotional wreck. I cried all day yesterday and I dont know why. Its different from the depression that I had years ago. I wasnt in a panic and didnt feel like I was losing control. It was more of a wave of crying that I couldnt fight. I wasnt scared or angry or sad, per say. I have been sad since Cinder got sick on Monday but the crying wasnt really from being sad. I picked Matt up from work since I needed to get out of the house for a bit and the second that I started to talk to him about my bad day, I started to cry again. No control at all. Maybe I was just tired since I feel alot better today. I did have a moment this morning reading something on facebook where I teared and felt like I couldnt stop the crying from coming.
Today my BBs are getting a little tender. Its like they are deep tissue sore more so then swollen and painful. Its weird. Ive already caved and tested a few times and Im driving myself crazy since its obviously BFN right now. The belly is still there... which I hope isnt just an addition of fat cause if it is then baby making will be off the table for a few months for me to lost weight. Its disgusting if its not baby related. It's really getting me down.
Maybe tomorrow I'll get my answer
Today my BBs are getting a little tender. Its like they are deep tissue sore more so then swollen and painful. Its weird. Ive already caved and tested a few times and Im driving myself crazy since its obviously BFN right now. The belly is still there... which I hope isnt just an addition of fat cause if it is then baby making will be off the table for a few months for me to lost weight. Its disgusting if its not baby related. It's really getting me down.
Maybe tomorrow I'll get my answer
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
CD 11- March 12th
I have been neglecting my posts... again! After I said I would post pictures. Its hard to do when Im at work. I have been getting some nice lines on my OPKs but still not anything +.
I am trying to test a few times a day but it seems that I have slacked off on that too. I am not so concerned with CP and CP or the OPKs this time around. I am hoping that my ace in the hole is going to be the PreSeed. I WILL have a March baby.
I work for two nights (CD11 and CD12) but I think if we manage to BD once at some point during those two days then we will be fine for O time.
Monday, March 12, 2012
CD7- March 8th
My posts will start off with my OPKs from today on!
I want to take a picture of them every single day and add the 'fresh' images here cause comparing the dried ones are getting tough. lol
So here is todays OPK. Negative, but Im getting crazy second lines. Not like last month. It was to the point where I took a HPT in the hopes that it was picking up hCg. No dice... but beautiful lines even so!!
I can NOT WAIT to get the big bright second positive line this month. I feel really good about this month!
I have been researching Zestica and PreSeed the last few days as well. (Ah, the luxury of four days off!) And I think, after playing with both lubes and seeing what they looked like and such, that Zestica is too watery to be helpful. I smeared a little on a piece of paper and the Z dried with an pily streak. The PS didnt leave anything behind. Also, when I stretched the two between my fingers the PS had some good stretchy rebound to it, just like EWCM. The Z didnt. It was less shape forming. Interesting. Im glad I went with the PreSeed this month. I have a whole tube and Im going to test out some tonight to see how much is enough/too much.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
CD 6- March 7th
CD6 already. I guess based on my O date last cycle, Im looking at about 9 more days till O day this cycle. Its happening so fast. Then Ill be back in that terrible TWW. That is something that Im not looking forward to. I hate the waiting. This time I have ordered a few hCG tests to keep my POAS addiction fed. I dont want to test early again this cycle but I think I already know that I will. I have to know!!! Its a sad and terrible thing, but I think that (I hope that) this month is our month... So many good things happening. Its DHs birthday, St. Patties day (Little Irish Luck??), our due date would be close to Christmas, and its right before our 2 year anniversary. Crazy that its two years already!! It would be a great time to be able to go visit Kitimat in May or June and tell everyone. Plus Ill be able to sport a small bump through the summer, which means I can still garden and sun tan, and then start my Mat Leave in Sept, right in time for school! Lots going on but the dates seem good. Just have to keep Operation EMSP in motion. Even my work schedule is clear for my O days and, AND its the weekend of DHs birthday so the BDing will be happening anyway.
I have noticed (maybe just wishful thinking, since I KNOW AF was here just days ago) that my BBs are a bit bigger. Not sore but the veins are more pronounced. I guess thats something left over from last month maybe.
I am gonna save most of my blogging for the TWW!!
I have noticed (maybe just wishful thinking, since I KNOW AF was here just days ago) that my BBs are a bit bigger. Not sore but the veins are more pronounced. I guess thats something left over from last month maybe.
I am gonna save most of my blogging for the TWW!!
Cycle 3- Operation SMEP!
So I got a heavy wickedly painful AF on March 2nd. Im sure it was an Early M/C. I have no other reason to be four days late. Everything that was going on was pointing toward pregnancy.
Im not going to dwell on it.
That leads me (Us) to here.
Cycle #3 Third time is the charm and all that crap lol
I have a plan this time. I am stocked with a billion OPKs to feed my POAS addiction. I have PreSeed, since Im seeing so many BFPs online with it, and Zestica proved to help but be a true Canadian disaster.
I also have a calendar full of dancing ladies... My little take on BabyDancing. lol
Todays run down:
CD 6 - OPKs negative, No symptoms unless you count my left over sore back from last cycle. My hips started killing me about three days before AF showed. Maybe that was a sign of my Early m/c and I didnt know it. :( Anyway, I am excited about this month. Again. I know I was last month but this month might be a better time to get on the Baby Train. It would mean that my due date would be December 7th 2012. A nice little bundle of joy for us as a Chirstmas gift. Plus this is our year off of DSD, so it would be PERFECT to have a baby and be able to get home this year.
My CP is all over the charts, so Im just checking for fun but not really paying attention to the height or anything. I am more interested in my CM, which I am still trying to match to my OPK +.
We did get some practice BDing in with a little slippery help. I am using the last bit of Zestica just to get it out of the house, plus since its super early in my cycle I dont want to use my PreSeed too soon and run out.
Looking forward to my little Leprechan bean!!
Im not going to dwell on it.
That leads me (Us) to here.
Cycle #3 Third time is the charm and all that crap lol
I have a plan this time. I am stocked with a billion OPKs to feed my POAS addiction. I have PreSeed, since Im seeing so many BFPs online with it, and Zestica proved to help but be a true Canadian disaster.
I also have a calendar full of dancing ladies... My little take on BabyDancing. lol
Todays run down:
CD 6 - OPKs negative, No symptoms unless you count my left over sore back from last cycle. My hips started killing me about three days before AF showed. Maybe that was a sign of my Early m/c and I didnt know it. :( Anyway, I am excited about this month. Again. I know I was last month but this month might be a better time to get on the Baby Train. It would mean that my due date would be December 7th 2012. A nice little bundle of joy for us as a Chirstmas gift. Plus this is our year off of DSD, so it would be PERFECT to have a baby and be able to get home this year.
My CP is all over the charts, so Im just checking for fun but not really paying attention to the height or anything. I am more interested in my CM, which I am still trying to match to my OPK +.
We did get some practice BDing in with a little slippery help. I am using the last bit of Zestica just to get it out of the house, plus since its super early in my cycle I dont want to use my PreSeed too soon and run out.
Looking forward to my little Leprechan bean!!
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Still no AF?!?!?!
1 p.m.
Ive made it to one and no show of AF.
Its now 6 P.M.... nothing. Not a cramp or tint of blood at all.
7:11 P.M.
I cheated and peed on a test I snuck with me. What a frigging dissapointment!! - - - - - - - Or at least I think it was. I looked and looked and looked (which every test instruction paper says is a bad thing if you have to search) and then I had a little heart flutter.... IS IT THERE??
I took it and marked where I thought I saw a shadow of a line and then brought up a picture of someone else's positive so I could compare lines and WTH!! I actually marked it RIGHT where the line is/or should be if I had in fact imagined it. I cant see it now, cause DUH, I marked the line with red marker then realized that it would bleed into the tests line and make it more pink... a lie pink.
So I cut the tips off where I marked it. And now Im back to being skeptical.
GRRRRR!!!
Im reading all sorts of crap online about it being a fading positive which is actually a negative. That a positive should be + for at LEAST 48 hours and not fade out. I have no clue now. My BBs are still sore and huge. CM is wet with bits of creaminess. CP is still high and medium. I dont know what to think. Im tired today but I was up most of the night, so Im not taking that into account.
I keep thinking that Im starting to feel back pain and cramps like AF. Im so scared. I dont want to TTC for another month! I know we have just just started but still! I dont want to wait and I think that stupid + (or whatever the hell it was) has made me anxious and hopeful. I was already counting the days and how far I would be for different dates... Silly me. Im sure that AF will be here tonight or tommorow morning. :(
More tomorrow!
Ive made it to one and no show of AF.
Its now 6 P.M.... nothing. Not a cramp or tint of blood at all.
7:11 P.M.
I cheated and peed on a test I snuck with me. What a frigging dissapointment!! - - - - - - - Or at least I think it was. I looked and looked and looked (which every test instruction paper says is a bad thing if you have to search) and then I had a little heart flutter.... IS IT THERE??
I took it and marked where I thought I saw a shadow of a line and then brought up a picture of someone else's positive so I could compare lines and WTH!! I actually marked it RIGHT where the line is/or should be if I had in fact imagined it. I cant see it now, cause DUH, I marked the line with red marker then realized that it would bleed into the tests line and make it more pink... a lie pink.
So I cut the tips off where I marked it. And now Im back to being skeptical.
GRRRRR!!!
Im reading all sorts of crap online about it being a fading positive which is actually a negative. That a positive should be + for at LEAST 48 hours and not fade out. I have no clue now. My BBs are still sore and huge. CM is wet with bits of creaminess. CP is still high and medium. I dont know what to think. Im tired today but I was up most of the night, so Im not taking that into account.
I keep thinking that Im starting to feel back pain and cramps like AF. Im so scared. I dont want to TTC for another month! I know we have just just started but still! I dont want to wait and I think that stupid + (or whatever the hell it was) has made me anxious and hopeful. I was already counting the days and how far I would be for different dates... Silly me. Im sure that AF will be here tonight or tommorow morning. :(
More tomorrow!
Monday, February 27, 2012
Cruel HPTs!!
I tested last night on a total whim ....
BFP???
Really?? I mean it showed up right right away. No waiting for the whole ten mins. It was there, faint and pink. I wandered around the house in a daze until I got the courage up to ask DH if he saw what I saw. He said he saw two lines!! EEEKKK!!\
So then I posted on BabyAndBump and EVERYONE is congratulating me. EVERYONE is saying its positive. I even think it was or is or could have been.... Im not even sure what the hell it was/is/could be at this point. I went to bed thinking that I was brewing a baby.. that I was gonna be a Mommy :)
I get up this morning and look at the test, even though I know that the rule is to not read test results after the ten minute mark. The line was basically gone. WTF???
It was a faint faint line and wasnt the whole way across the + area from side to side to begin with but when I got up this morning it was just the middle that was still pink-ish. I freaked out. I ripped the plastic case off the test strip to look at it and sure enough the middle of the + line was still visibly pink. The rest of it had faded out though. I have googled THE SHIT out of it all day and I cant find a reason why it would go pink then fade out. Basically it might have been a bad test or it might have been splash (although the hCG would only show if it was in the urine, regardless of splash or not).
Of course I couldnt help myself and went to check the mail today and my HPTs from the internet were there, thank god!!
I ran home and didnt bother to pick up anymore (I had 2 extra sensitive and 2 regular ones) cause I figured I was set. I would just calmly drive home and use the regular one and get my BFP.
NOT HOW IT WENT.
I ended up using 3 of the 4 test and then thinking 'They must be a bad batch" and ran into town to get some legit ones.
I get home with 90$ in HPTs, three different kinds, to be exact. I rip open the FRER 6 day ( like the one I got my + on last night) and confident that Im going to just be able to laugh this all off, I POAS.
NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING.... Seriously?? What the HELL!!!
Im so confused and I actually lied to DH about testing again today. He asked if we got two lines again and I told him I was going to wait till I got back from working out of town before I tested again. I packed all the party favors incase AF shows but Im so desperatly hoping that she doesnt!! I cant imagine the low I might have to feel tomorrow if I get AF. UGHHHHHH!!!!
My BBs are HUGE today and started getting sore last night (tiny tiny bit) and then today they are super sore to brush against. I am hungry more and getting full faster. Smells are stronger, or so they seem. Im cramping on and off and have been since yesterday evening. CP is still high and firm/medium and was watery but now its more or less dry. CO is still feeling like its open. I have a wicked sick tummy tonight. Ive been in and out of the bathroom with terrible bowel cramps. Still no AF even though I have loose BMs. Im scared to wipe and see blood. I dont really have AF cramps right now but I dont know if I could feel them over the bowel cramps.
Im basically making myself crazy and Im sure that tomorrow I will feel like an ass for showing DH the test last night. I should have waited till I was late late.
On to next month and some PreSeed I guess.... I am counting myself pitifully out :(
BFP???
Really?? I mean it showed up right right away. No waiting for the whole ten mins. It was there, faint and pink. I wandered around the house in a daze until I got the courage up to ask DH if he saw what I saw. He said he saw two lines!! EEEKKK!!\
So then I posted on BabyAndBump and EVERYONE is congratulating me. EVERYONE is saying its positive. I even think it was or is or could have been.... Im not even sure what the hell it was/is/could be at this point. I went to bed thinking that I was brewing a baby.. that I was gonna be a Mommy :)
I get up this morning and look at the test, even though I know that the rule is to not read test results after the ten minute mark. The line was basically gone. WTF???
It was a faint faint line and wasnt the whole way across the + area from side to side to begin with but when I got up this morning it was just the middle that was still pink-ish. I freaked out. I ripped the plastic case off the test strip to look at it and sure enough the middle of the + line was still visibly pink. The rest of it had faded out though. I have googled THE SHIT out of it all day and I cant find a reason why it would go pink then fade out. Basically it might have been a bad test or it might have been splash (although the hCG would only show if it was in the urine, regardless of splash or not).
Of course I couldnt help myself and went to check the mail today and my HPTs from the internet were there, thank god!!
I ran home and didnt bother to pick up anymore (I had 2 extra sensitive and 2 regular ones) cause I figured I was set. I would just calmly drive home and use the regular one and get my BFP.
NOT HOW IT WENT.
I ended up using 3 of the 4 test and then thinking 'They must be a bad batch" and ran into town to get some legit ones.
I get home with 90$ in HPTs, three different kinds, to be exact. I rip open the FRER 6 day ( like the one I got my + on last night) and confident that Im going to just be able to laugh this all off, I POAS.
NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING.... Seriously?? What the HELL!!!
Im so confused and I actually lied to DH about testing again today. He asked if we got two lines again and I told him I was going to wait till I got back from working out of town before I tested again. I packed all the party favors incase AF shows but Im so desperatly hoping that she doesnt!! I cant imagine the low I might have to feel tomorrow if I get AF. UGHHHHHH!!!!
My BBs are HUGE today and started getting sore last night (tiny tiny bit) and then today they are super sore to brush against. I am hungry more and getting full faster. Smells are stronger, or so they seem. Im cramping on and off and have been since yesterday evening. CP is still high and firm/medium and was watery but now its more or less dry. CO is still feeling like its open. I have a wicked sick tummy tonight. Ive been in and out of the bathroom with terrible bowel cramps. Still no AF even though I have loose BMs. Im scared to wipe and see blood. I dont really have AF cramps right now but I dont know if I could feel them over the bowel cramps.
Im basically making myself crazy and Im sure that tomorrow I will feel like an ass for showing DH the test last night. I should have waited till I was late late.
On to next month and some PreSeed I guess.... I am counting myself pitifully out :(
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Cycle #2, CD 10
I havent been able to sneak away and update this in a while. DH is home full time now and BabyMaking is in full swing. We have been talking alot about the whole experiance and buying a whole bunch of baby stuff.... boy and girl. I told him that I think a boy would be nice. We have a whole load of names picked out too. Now just the getting pregnant part we have to focus on.
I ordered OPKs from the intrnet and have been using them since CD 1. Very very early but I didnt want to miss anything. I had no idea if I O'ed early or not and I thought that starting the tests right away would help me figureit out. I have been checking CP and CO still but definatly not as obsessivly. I have been going back thorough my apps and seeing what days and symptoms make sense with all the reading that I have been doing. Im learning lots about the different hormones and how they relate to the sympotms that Ive had or thought that I have had. Its kinda interesting to already be seeing a pattern. I can see where my body starts producing more progesterone and how it affects the way my BBs get sore. I think that last cycle was a good one, and we would have made a baby if DH was home during O. I saw that he was home and we BD'ed diring the right time in December but I think that my body still isnt producing the optimum kind or amount of CM.. This time I have upped our chances with Zestica. Its a fertility lubricant that mimics EWCM and should provide his swimmers with a little slippery help :)
I ordered OPKs from the intrnet and have been using them since CD 1. Very very early but I didnt want to miss anything. I had no idea if I O'ed early or not and I thought that starting the tests right away would help me figureit out. I have been checking CP and CO still but definatly not as obsessivly. I have been going back thorough my apps and seeing what days and symptoms make sense with all the reading that I have been doing. Im learning lots about the different hormones and how they relate to the sympotms that Ive had or thought that I have had. Its kinda interesting to already be seeing a pattern. I can see where my body starts producing more progesterone and how it affects the way my BBs get sore. I think that last cycle was a good one, and we would have made a baby if DH was home during O. I saw that he was home and we BD'ed diring the right time in December but I think that my body still isnt producing the optimum kind or amount of CM.. This time I have upped our chances with Zestica. Its a fertility lubricant that mimics EWCM and should provide his swimmers with a little slippery help :)
Friday, January 27, 2012
CD 20, 12 DPO, Jan 27 2012
I think my eyes are playing tricks on me!!!
I got up late again this morning, but I WAS up till 1 am so thats not too unusual. I was getting into the shower today and notcied that some of my previous stretchmarks are all pink and inflamed again. I have gained a ton of weight but it was an overnight change to the marks I have had for years. I as Im inspecting my marks, I moved a bit and caught what I think might be the start of some baby belly bloating!!! Not like the usual AF type bloating where I notice it down low on my belly close to my pubic bone. This bloating is higher, almost near my bellybutton and about the level of my hip bones. An intesresting body change if nothing else! Im gonna look cute with a baby bump, if I do say so myself!!
DH is home tonight for the weekend and Im not sure how Im going to hide the baby-crazy thats been going on in my head. Im gonna try though.
I ran into town and got two PG test.. BFN.
Im not sad. Im still a week from AF so maybe with my short cycles Ill have to wait to test till closer to AF due date. I dont feel like Im out yet. I actually feel really good about this still.
My cervix this morning was still high and soft-ish and wasnt too tender when I touched it, but just now I checked and its high, firmer then this morning and tender to the touch. I didnt check CO this time around but it was closed this morning. Im getting tired around 6 or 7 at night every night, where I could nap if I layed down but I am often playing on my computer and just work through the feelings. lol
I got up late again this morning, but I WAS up till 1 am so thats not too unusual. I was getting into the shower today and notcied that some of my previous stretchmarks are all pink and inflamed again. I have gained a ton of weight but it was an overnight change to the marks I have had for years. I as Im inspecting my marks, I moved a bit and caught what I think might be the start of some baby belly bloating!!! Not like the usual AF type bloating where I notice it down low on my belly close to my pubic bone. This bloating is higher, almost near my bellybutton and about the level of my hip bones. An intesresting body change if nothing else! Im gonna look cute with a baby bump, if I do say so myself!!
DH is home tonight for the weekend and Im not sure how Im going to hide the baby-crazy thats been going on in my head. Im gonna try though.
I ran into town and got two PG test.. BFN.
Im not sad. Im still a week from AF so maybe with my short cycles Ill have to wait to test till closer to AF due date. I dont feel like Im out yet. I actually feel really good about this still.
My cervix this morning was still high and soft-ish and wasnt too tender when I touched it, but just now I checked and its high, firmer then this morning and tender to the touch. I didnt check CO this time around but it was closed this morning. Im getting tired around 6 or 7 at night every night, where I could nap if I layed down but I am often playing on my computer and just work through the feelings. lol
Thursday, January 26, 2012
CD 19, 11DPO, Jan 26 2012
??????????
Everything but sore BBs is gone. My sore throat, the headache, the cramps, the bloating... its all gone.
My nose is still pretty runny, so that something I guess.
I did notice that when I checked CM and CP today that my cervix was tender to the touch. It feels spongy too. I can sort of feel the CO but not as wide open as it was before. CP is high. I can feel the 'neck' (the underside of the cervix, posterior to the CO and where it connects to the vagina.) is super short, maybe an inch or less....Again something new. My BBs weren't too bad this morning when I got up but now (7:30pm) they are sore again, as well as the nipples. They aren't really any bigger, but the nipples seem a little bit darker then they were a few days ago but it could be wishful thinking.
I am super tired tonight.... I just noticed it when I checked the time. I am yawning like crazy and my eyes are heavy!!! I slept till 8 am when the dogs wanted to go out then I went back to bed till 9:45! I don't usually sleep this much, and I'm definitely not tired this early at night! Maybe things are more promising then I think.
Later... So I went for a bath and noticed that I was more bloated then usual. Its like I have AF bloating but I have no cramps and its a week early. Usually I only get bloated the day of AF showing up. Its an interesting sign, although I'm not sure if its even a sign. I'm hoping it is!!
Everything but sore BBs is gone. My sore throat, the headache, the cramps, the bloating... its all gone.
My nose is still pretty runny, so that something I guess.
I did notice that when I checked CM and CP today that my cervix was tender to the touch. It feels spongy too. I can sort of feel the CO but not as wide open as it was before. CP is high. I can feel the 'neck' (the underside of the cervix, posterior to the CO and where it connects to the vagina.) is super short, maybe an inch or less....Again something new. My BBs weren't too bad this morning when I got up but now (7:30pm) they are sore again, as well as the nipples. They aren't really any bigger, but the nipples seem a little bit darker then they were a few days ago but it could be wishful thinking.
I am super tired tonight.... I just noticed it when I checked the time. I am yawning like crazy and my eyes are heavy!!! I slept till 8 am when the dogs wanted to go out then I went back to bed till 9:45! I don't usually sleep this much, and I'm definitely not tired this early at night! Maybe things are more promising then I think.
Later... So I went for a bath and noticed that I was more bloated then usual. Its like I have AF bloating but I have no cramps and its a week early. Usually I only get bloated the day of AF showing up. Its an interesting sign, although I'm not sure if its even a sign. I'm hoping it is!!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
CD 18, 10DPO, Jan 25 2012
Ugh! I'm sick sick sick!!
It started last night at work. My tonsils were super swollen and red. I felt like I had a fever but didn't. It hurt to swallow and I was soooo thirsty! The headache was there when I woke up and still there when I got out of bed around noon. I still didn't take anything for it and went into town. I felt like crap. I had lunch and went to get another thermometer, cause my pain in the ass cats took mine and played with it, so only they know where it is, and some Tylenol. Its funny how concerned with pregnancy related safety I am all of a sudden. And how much I don't feel like drinking. Anyway, I made some stops in town but in an hour I was about done and ready to come home. I was hot and achy and felt like general crap. My BBs weren't tender at all today when I got up but by 8 tonight they were tender and sore to the touch. CP is still high and soft. I cant feel the CO but the other day I could feel a small bump on it again. I'm tired today too. I could have napped when I got home but instead I was just lazy :) My temp is 99.8, which is higher then its been. I'm cranky and emotional. I had a huge crying spell today after a phone call. I could feel how ridiculous it was for my outburst but I couldn't control it. I hope its a pregnancy monster rearing its head. I think tonight that I'm a tad bit more sensitive to smells, everything smells stronger. I noticed it first with the dogs bone. It was laying on the floor beside the couch and I could smell it like it was on my lap! And for the last hour or so, I SWEAR one of the animals has gone to the bathroom somewhere but I just cant find it! GRRR!!
I am thinking that bed might be a good idea already at 9:20... and I slept till noon today! Maybe this is the tired feeling everyone else but me seems to have.
OH OH OH OH OH OH!! So I figured I was 10 DPO today and I was super jealous that one of the ladies that I chat with on BabyAndBump got a BFP today, that I should grab one of the 6$ test and POAS!
I swear to whatever is out there that there was a faint faint line on the ClearBlue. I had a holy shit moment, and then figured that I must be seeing things so I threw it out. Of course the faint little line got the better of me and instead of second guessing all night, I pulled out a First Response and peed again (right away, Might I add..Full bladder) and got a BFN. Hmm.. Too quick for the first to be evap but not dark enough for a positive for sure. I even went back several times to check the test, pulling them from the garbage. lol I took apart the ClearBlue to see if I could see a better line! I may or may not have been imagining it... I hope I wasn't! The First Response test wasn't ever anything but a BFN. I guess I will try again tomorrow and see what happens. I'm down to one test so I may wait.
I also ordered some OPKs from a website online. 100 of them. LOL I think that should do me. If theres no BFP this month then I'm going to use the OPK to help me confirm my O days. I think that will help, although I'm still pretty confident that we may have done things right this cycle.
I'm almost mentally preparing myself for the possible shock of getting AF... I should be off that day so I will be able to have a little freakout on my own time. :( Its still a whole 7 days away but that goes so fast that I have to start preparing myself now for the assault.
I was sort of surprised at my reaction when I saw the little faint line. I didn't panic at all. I just felt super excited. I still worry if this is the right time or if this will be the 'We will make it work' kinda life Ill always have. I guess either way, your never really prepared for a baby. I also guess that DH better get his butt in gear and start getting some cash for a sparkly for me if hes planning on growing a mini-him in my belly. ;)
It started last night at work. My tonsils were super swollen and red. I felt like I had a fever but didn't. It hurt to swallow and I was soooo thirsty! The headache was there when I woke up and still there when I got out of bed around noon. I still didn't take anything for it and went into town. I felt like crap. I had lunch and went to get another thermometer, cause my pain in the ass cats took mine and played with it, so only they know where it is, and some Tylenol. Its funny how concerned with pregnancy related safety I am all of a sudden. And how much I don't feel like drinking. Anyway, I made some stops in town but in an hour I was about done and ready to come home. I was hot and achy and felt like general crap. My BBs weren't tender at all today when I got up but by 8 tonight they were tender and sore to the touch. CP is still high and soft. I cant feel the CO but the other day I could feel a small bump on it again. I'm tired today too. I could have napped when I got home but instead I was just lazy :) My temp is 99.8, which is higher then its been. I'm cranky and emotional. I had a huge crying spell today after a phone call. I could feel how ridiculous it was for my outburst but I couldn't control it. I hope its a pregnancy monster rearing its head. I think tonight that I'm a tad bit more sensitive to smells, everything smells stronger. I noticed it first with the dogs bone. It was laying on the floor beside the couch and I could smell it like it was on my lap! And for the last hour or so, I SWEAR one of the animals has gone to the bathroom somewhere but I just cant find it! GRRR!!
I am thinking that bed might be a good idea already at 9:20... and I slept till noon today! Maybe this is the tired feeling everyone else but me seems to have.
OH OH OH OH OH OH!! So I figured I was 10 DPO today and I was super jealous that one of the ladies that I chat with on BabyAndBump got a BFP today, that I should grab one of the 6$ test and POAS!
I swear to whatever is out there that there was a faint faint line on the ClearBlue. I had a holy shit moment, and then figured that I must be seeing things so I threw it out. Of course the faint little line got the better of me and instead of second guessing all night, I pulled out a First Response and peed again (right away, Might I add..Full bladder) and got a BFN. Hmm.. Too quick for the first to be evap but not dark enough for a positive for sure. I even went back several times to check the test, pulling them from the garbage. lol I took apart the ClearBlue to see if I could see a better line! I may or may not have been imagining it... I hope I wasn't! The First Response test wasn't ever anything but a BFN. I guess I will try again tomorrow and see what happens. I'm down to one test so I may wait.
I also ordered some OPKs from a website online. 100 of them. LOL I think that should do me. If theres no BFP this month then I'm going to use the OPK to help me confirm my O days. I think that will help, although I'm still pretty confident that we may have done things right this cycle.
I'm almost mentally preparing myself for the possible shock of getting AF... I should be off that day so I will be able to have a little freakout on my own time. :( Its still a whole 7 days away but that goes so fast that I have to start preparing myself now for the assault.
I was sort of surprised at my reaction when I saw the little faint line. I didn't panic at all. I just felt super excited. I still worry if this is the right time or if this will be the 'We will make it work' kinda life Ill always have. I guess either way, your never really prepared for a baby. I also guess that DH better get his butt in gear and start getting some cash for a sparkly for me if hes planning on growing a mini-him in my belly. ;)
CD 17, 9DPO, Jan 24 2012
My back is still sore. Not as bad as yesterday but still enough that I notice. Its exactly like the AF type back ache I get. My BBs are more sore and swollen as the day goes on. I have noticed that the are almost normal in the morning and by bedtime they are super tender. The nipples are a bit swollen looking and it seems like they have little bumps around them (??Maybe??). I have been sneezing like crazy today. I woke up at some point last night with some coughing, but I don't have a fever, at all.
I had another interesting dream!!
I dreamt that I was looking at pictures of myself. The one I remember is me in a hospital gown, holding a bundle of blankets. I look like total crap but so happy too. I was laying in a bed and it must have been a picture that was taken right after delivery :) I remember talking to someone in my dream that I was upset that I had to have a C-section. More baby dreams!! Ill take it as a very good sign.
I felt pretty sluggish overall today. I didn't want to get motivated at all. I had a few small dizzy spells today during the morning hours. My headache started at around 4 pm. It was a light, more annoying then painful ache in my neck and head. I didn't want to take anything just in case. I tried to drink lots of water thinking that it may have been that, but it didn't help. I had cramps on and off all day, but not intense at all.
Other then that, I guess most of the "typical signs" either aren't going to start or haven't started yet
I have never looked forward to throwing up and headaches so much! LOL
I had another interesting dream!!
I dreamt that I was looking at pictures of myself. The one I remember is me in a hospital gown, holding a bundle of blankets. I look like total crap but so happy too. I was laying in a bed and it must have been a picture that was taken right after delivery :) I remember talking to someone in my dream that I was upset that I had to have a C-section. More baby dreams!! Ill take it as a very good sign.
I felt pretty sluggish overall today. I didn't want to get motivated at all. I had a few small dizzy spells today during the morning hours. My headache started at around 4 pm. It was a light, more annoying then painful ache in my neck and head. I didn't want to take anything just in case. I tried to drink lots of water thinking that it may have been that, but it didn't help. I had cramps on and off all day, but not intense at all.
Other then that, I guess most of the "typical signs" either aren't going to start or haven't started yet
I have never looked forward to throwing up and headaches so much! LOL
Monday, January 23, 2012
CD 16, 8DPO, Jan 23 2012
So my back was ON FIRE today. I was standing doing dishes and I could barely finish the sink full. My nipples are slightly sore again. Not so bad during the morning hours but once night hits... Whew. I can definetly feel them when I brush up against something. I worked tonight and around 8pm I got some major major AF type cramps. The worst I have had in a long long while. The pain was exactly like I get the day of AF. No spotting at all though. The pain from my tummy was strong enough to radiate into my left hip joint and down into my upper thigh, as well as the whole was across my lower back.
OUCH!!
I didnt see to get any relief from stretching or changing position. I just had to sleep on the opposite side and work through it. Im not sure when it stopped. I actually slept pretty deep.
The one thing that suprised me and excited me was that unloading a patient from the truck, I brought the stretcher close to my BBs and instantly my nipples started to ache when they were touched!!
My CP is still high and I feel a bit softer.
Thats about all!
OUCH!!
I didnt see to get any relief from stretching or changing position. I just had to sleep on the opposite side and work through it. Im not sure when it stopped. I actually slept pretty deep.
The one thing that suprised me and excited me was that unloading a patient from the truck, I brought the stretcher close to my BBs and instantly my nipples started to ache when they were touched!!
My CP is still high and I feel a bit softer.
Thats about all!
Sunday, January 22, 2012
CD 15. Weirdness!!! And new interesting-ness!!, Jan 22 2012
I had the weirdest dream last night.I dreamt that I was alone, driving along a dark highway in the snow. Not the weird part. The weird part was that at some point in my dream I decided to put myself on an online dating website because I remember feeling desperately lonely in my dream. Then I remember being in a coffee shop with an ex (yuck :( ) and asking him if we were going to get back together ( could be cause of the show I watched last night. Lol) and then kissing him, and thinking it was really wet and gross. I didn't feel happy about it in my dream. Then, I was at a pool.... There was a girl I know from high school and I was there with DH. The girl asked me to get changed into a gown and we would 'take a look at the heartbeat' so I went to go get changed in the pool change room. I passed three really shallow pools that had flowers in them. Like decorative fountains almost. It was really warm and I felt relaxed. I hanged and came back and the girl was telling me that it was still early, asked if I had tested and when I said no she said it would be two more days before I would get a positive.
Holy shit!!
Two more days?? That would put me CD 17 and 9 DPO. Curious. Most of the women I hear about get their BFP at around 9 to 11 DPO.
I remember in my dream that I saw an ultrasound on the table and I could see a little baby :). Unfortunately, the dogs were moving around this morning and woke me up :( before the dream could go any further.
I have no idea what it means and I don't even know if it means anything at all. I really hope that it's some giant prophecy that will come true. I'll totally be testing in a few days.
I've been having some BM issues. I have been having a harder time lately being regular. I've never really been constipated and I can't really tell if the tender belly is bowel related or what. Interesting thing last night, I was playing (;) DH has been gone too long already) and after I finished my entire uterus was contracting and sooooo sore. It definitely wasn't bladder soreness. It was wavelike cramps just like AF but orgasm intense, right above my pubic bone and in the center. I figure that it being sore is a good sign. I haven't had any infection type symptoms so I know it's not that.
Another thing I noticed today was that my nipples are sore. Not like the sore they sometimes get when the piercings are acting up but soreness at the core of the nipple, like its inside the breast tissue. My BBs aren't really sore, just the tops are a bit swollen and the veins seem to have gone away.
My tummy is still feeling like I have a rock sitting in it after I eat and my appetite has changed. I'm leaning toward more healthy choices like veggies and water. I have had so much water in the last few days and I don't normally make that my first choice, unfortunately. I don't really have cramps anymore like I did for the first few DPO, but I do get them off and on, very lightly. I still have the soreness when I push on my belly but its not hurting while I walk around or sit anymore. I guess that if anything, its likely that it was some implantation cramping. I can say for certain that I O'ed early this cycle because my original fertile days were from January 16th to January 21st, Not the 11th to the 15th that I actually did and I have not had a change in CM since the 15th when I dried up. FXed that it all means something good!!
Im going to have to research more about due dates.. But it still 40 weeks which puts me at October 21st 2012. Lots of 1 and 2's in that date. Lol. I guess Ill be around 24 weeks on June 24th which will also mean that I will be off for the summer!! Great timing!
Holy shit!!
Two more days?? That would put me CD 17 and 9 DPO. Curious. Most of the women I hear about get their BFP at around 9 to 11 DPO.
I remember in my dream that I saw an ultrasound on the table and I could see a little baby :). Unfortunately, the dogs were moving around this morning and woke me up :( before the dream could go any further.
I have no idea what it means and I don't even know if it means anything at all. I really hope that it's some giant prophecy that will come true. I'll totally be testing in a few days.
I've been having some BM issues. I have been having a harder time lately being regular. I've never really been constipated and I can't really tell if the tender belly is bowel related or what. Interesting thing last night, I was playing (;) DH has been gone too long already) and after I finished my entire uterus was contracting and sooooo sore. It definitely wasn't bladder soreness. It was wavelike cramps just like AF but orgasm intense, right above my pubic bone and in the center. I figure that it being sore is a good sign. I haven't had any infection type symptoms so I know it's not that.
Another thing I noticed today was that my nipples are sore. Not like the sore they sometimes get when the piercings are acting up but soreness at the core of the nipple, like its inside the breast tissue. My BBs aren't really sore, just the tops are a bit swollen and the veins seem to have gone away.
My tummy is still feeling like I have a rock sitting in it after I eat and my appetite has changed. I'm leaning toward more healthy choices like veggies and water. I have had so much water in the last few days and I don't normally make that my first choice, unfortunately. I don't really have cramps anymore like I did for the first few DPO, but I do get them off and on, very lightly. I still have the soreness when I push on my belly but its not hurting while I walk around or sit anymore. I guess that if anything, its likely that it was some implantation cramping. I can say for certain that I O'ed early this cycle because my original fertile days were from January 16th to January 21st, Not the 11th to the 15th that I actually did and I have not had a change in CM since the 15th when I dried up. FXed that it all means something good!!
Im going to have to research more about due dates.. But it still 40 weeks which puts me at October 21st 2012. Lots of 1 and 2's in that date. Lol. I guess Ill be around 24 weeks on June 24th which will also mean that I will be off for the summer!! Great timing!
Saturday, January 21, 2012
CD 14, Jan 21 2012
Missed yesterdays post! Working too much to do this everyday!
Anyway, yesterday was more of the same. Some little stuff I noticed. I actually googled UTIs because of my super tender bladder. I don't have a fever or cloudy urine so I doubt that's what it is. Plus I know that you can get it from too much sex but it didn't start to hurt until days after DH left. I've been peeing a lot more then normal and smaller amounts like I can't hold a regular full bladder. The sensation to need to pee gets really intense really fast. I almost panic when it hits. Food is just sitting at the top of my tummy like its not getting digested. I still feel like I'm drying out. I'm tired today, but had a terrible sleep last night so that's probably why.
Later on last night I noticed a giant dark vein on the middle of my left breast. BBs were sore to the touch on the tops only. They also looked a not swollen.
I have googled my 'symptoms' to death and haven't really gotten fatter then 'every body responds differently' Which really isn't any kind of answer at all.
Today I didn't feel too much of anything. Had a small BM today and urine is clear and yellow.
:( not really any signs. Haven't really been hungry but I had a bowl of fruit and yogurt at 8am.
By 10am I had a few cramps like before. I AM HUNGRY and I just ate a bowl of yogurt and grains at 8!!! Tummy is growling! Im a little light headed but sure that's because of the hunger this morning.
We got a transfer to GP and i was tired the whole way to GP and the i slept the whole way back in the passenger seat i just couldnt keep my eyes open I was still sluggish till bed time. Little bit of gas rumbling but no wind?? I feel bloated but its not like gas. I played tonight and had O! (lol DH has ben gone for too long) Right away felt cramps in my uterus!!! Funny how that tender feeling was pinpointed by the O! I can totally feel where it is now.
No CM at all still outside. When I sweep my CM is minimal and sticky-like
One odd thin.... I had three REALLY sharp shooting pains in my left flank area near the belly button above hip bone/pubic bone at around 11am. They made me hold my breath for a few seconds. I stretched and tried to make them go away but it didn't help. Weird...
Anyway, yesterday was more of the same. Some little stuff I noticed. I actually googled UTIs because of my super tender bladder. I don't have a fever or cloudy urine so I doubt that's what it is. Plus I know that you can get it from too much sex but it didn't start to hurt until days after DH left. I've been peeing a lot more then normal and smaller amounts like I can't hold a regular full bladder. The sensation to need to pee gets really intense really fast. I almost panic when it hits. Food is just sitting at the top of my tummy like its not getting digested. I still feel like I'm drying out. I'm tired today, but had a terrible sleep last night so that's probably why.
Later on last night I noticed a giant dark vein on the middle of my left breast. BBs were sore to the touch on the tops only. They also looked a not swollen.
I have googled my 'symptoms' to death and haven't really gotten fatter then 'every body responds differently' Which really isn't any kind of answer at all.
Today I didn't feel too much of anything. Had a small BM today and urine is clear and yellow.
:( not really any signs. Haven't really been hungry but I had a bowl of fruit and yogurt at 8am.
By 10am I had a few cramps like before. I AM HUNGRY and I just ate a bowl of yogurt and grains at 8!!! Tummy is growling! Im a little light headed but sure that's because of the hunger this morning.
We got a transfer to GP and i was tired the whole way to GP and the i slept the whole way back in the passenger seat i just couldnt keep my eyes open I was still sluggish till bed time. Little bit of gas rumbling but no wind?? I feel bloated but its not like gas. I played tonight and had O! (lol DH has ben gone for too long) Right away felt cramps in my uterus!!! Funny how that tender feeling was pinpointed by the O! I can totally feel where it is now.
No CM at all still outside. When I sweep my CM is minimal and sticky-like
One odd thin.... I had three REALLY sharp shooting pains in my left flank area near the belly button above hip bone/pubic bone at around 11am. They made me hold my breath for a few seconds. I stretched and tried to make them go away but it didn't help. Weird...
Thursday, January 19, 2012
CD 12, Jan 19 2012
Ugh!
I don't know if there's anything to be excited about today. I am wondering if I am imagining some of the things that I am feeling now. I didn't have alot of the dull cramps today, not alot of the heartburn that I had yesterday, and not alot of much going on today
I did notice that I was a bit dizzy this morning after I got up but it wasn't anything alarming. My pelvis feels bloated but not like yesterday was. I'm a bit gassy but again, not sure if that matters or is related. I had a light breakfast and a bagel for lunch because I wasn't really hungry at all today. I have had a dry mouth and thirsty issue for the last three days along with a runny nose. I have been checking CM all day today, like I magically expect it to change drastically, but more of the same dry/wet/sticky inside thing.
As I'm sitting here (at work :( ) writing I can feel my tummy flopping around. More like an unsettled feeling then anything else with little bits of "Oh, if this keeps going, I'm gonna be sick!" thoughts but I doubt that it will go farther then a rumble in my tummy. I am super tired today too and haven't really done anything at all today. I was able to sleep in but maybe the little cold I have plus dealing with my families issues in BC has gotten to me. I did an O test this morning and got a faint line, then did one again tonight and got zip. I have lost faith in them since I'm almost positive that I O'ed on CD 8 or close to there. I really hope that I don't have to track this crap again next month. Id rather be reading about a growing baby then my CM this time next month. Little bit moody today it would seem!
Officially 14 days till AF... FX!!!
I don't know if there's anything to be excited about today. I am wondering if I am imagining some of the things that I am feeling now. I didn't have alot of the dull cramps today, not alot of the heartburn that I had yesterday, and not alot of much going on today
I did notice that I was a bit dizzy this morning after I got up but it wasn't anything alarming. My pelvis feels bloated but not like yesterday was. I'm a bit gassy but again, not sure if that matters or is related. I had a light breakfast and a bagel for lunch because I wasn't really hungry at all today. I have had a dry mouth and thirsty issue for the last three days along with a runny nose. I have been checking CM all day today, like I magically expect it to change drastically, but more of the same dry/wet/sticky inside thing.
As I'm sitting here (at work :( ) writing I can feel my tummy flopping around. More like an unsettled feeling then anything else with little bits of "Oh, if this keeps going, I'm gonna be sick!" thoughts but I doubt that it will go farther then a rumble in my tummy. I am super tired today too and haven't really done anything at all today. I was able to sleep in but maybe the little cold I have plus dealing with my families issues in BC has gotten to me. I did an O test this morning and got a faint line, then did one again tonight and got zip. I have lost faith in them since I'm almost positive that I O'ed on CD 8 or close to there. I really hope that I don't have to track this crap again next month. Id rather be reading about a growing baby then my CM this time next month. Little bit moody today it would seem!
Officially 14 days till AF... FX!!!
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Confused! CD 11...Jan 18 2012
I have no idea if I O'ed or not yet. I think I have. I'm almost positive that I have. And, bold I know, but I am almost positive that I am going to find out that I am pregnant in a few weeks. I have still been dry, but wet at the same time. I am dry when I wipe but then I check my CM and its watery and wet around my cervix. Another odd change that I noticed today that confuses and interests me is that I felt a bump on my cervix today. Where the dimple is, it felt like a bump pushing outward instead of a dimple inward. Its super weird, but it doesn't worry me. I am a bit excited that there is a change that I noticed this cycle. Ive been having dull aching in my pelvis all day with it getting stronger around 2pm. Its almost like AF pressure, but with a quick twinge here and there. And not even close to as intense. I had a bit of heartburn that started around 3 or 4 pm. I didn't feel like eating so I nibbled a bit instead.
Tonight I rechecked my CM and its still dry on the outside, wet feeling on the inside and a tiny bit of sticky white CM when I really sweep. I don't know what to think. I went for a bath and when I got out I was having little bouts of queasy feelings and a wicked dizzy spell after getting up too fast then leaning down. I had to squeeze my eyes shut and wait for a few seconds. I'm not sure whats going on! I almost feel like I'm getting the flu or something. I have had a runny nose for the last three days. I'm bloated too. I took some of my psyllum fiber to see if I can get some things moving and see if the bloating goes down.
Part of me is super excited by the cramps and the dizzy spell and the feeling sick. I don't want to read too much into it but I'm hoping so hard that I may have a shot this month. I was actually really disappointed last month when AF showed up. I think that keeping this all to myself instead of sharing it with DH is keeping the stress to a minimum. I don't feel like I can analyze every 'symptom' with him and get his hopes up too. It would be so great to just tell him without going through the ups and downs together. Ill leave that for the actual pregnancy :) I think alot about how I'm going to tell him when it happens.
I tested again with an O test and got a faint link on the positive side, which confuses me because of my CM. I don't know what to think. I guess if I have to do another cycle then Ill have to order some OPK's and do them every 12 hours like all the websites say to. I was and still am really hopeful that the one I saw on CD6 (Friday the 13th) was right. I'm already doing the count down... Only a million days to go!
Count down to Feb 2nd.... 15 days to go!
Tonight I rechecked my CM and its still dry on the outside, wet feeling on the inside and a tiny bit of sticky white CM when I really sweep. I don't know what to think. I went for a bath and when I got out I was having little bouts of queasy feelings and a wicked dizzy spell after getting up too fast then leaning down. I had to squeeze my eyes shut and wait for a few seconds. I'm not sure whats going on! I almost feel like I'm getting the flu or something. I have had a runny nose for the last three days. I'm bloated too. I took some of my psyllum fiber to see if I can get some things moving and see if the bloating goes down.
Part of me is super excited by the cramps and the dizzy spell and the feeling sick. I don't want to read too much into it but I'm hoping so hard that I may have a shot this month. I was actually really disappointed last month when AF showed up. I think that keeping this all to myself instead of sharing it with DH is keeping the stress to a minimum. I don't feel like I can analyze every 'symptom' with him and get his hopes up too. It would be so great to just tell him without going through the ups and downs together. Ill leave that for the actual pregnancy :) I think alot about how I'm going to tell him when it happens.
I tested again with an O test and got a faint link on the positive side, which confuses me because of my CM. I don't know what to think. I guess if I have to do another cycle then Ill have to order some OPK's and do them every 12 hours like all the websites say to. I was and still am really hopeful that the one I saw on CD6 (Friday the 13th) was right. I'm already doing the count down... Only a million days to go!
Count down to Feb 2nd.... 15 days to go!
Monday, January 16, 2012
CD9, maybe 3DTO???, Jan 16 2012
I've been neglecting my post but to be fair we have been BDing like mad ;)
So an update then:
CD6, Jan 13 2012: Watery CM, took an O test and got a faint faint line.. I have no idea if I caught it just after or if it was a fluke. I know they say it's not a positive until the two lines match or the one is darker then the test line but who knows. I get the nagging feeling that I do in fact ovulate early so we will see. I remember that on CD 9 last cycle I had chunky EWCM and didn't think anything of it because the calendar was telling me that I O on CD 12. We BDed a few times around then but no luck. Anyway the faint line confuses me. There's a picture on the bottom, can't really tell from the picture but the second one is a few days later after it dried. Faint line!! I have several tests still to use so I'll keep testing to see of I get a positive this cycle. I also plan to order O tests from online and keep testing through my cycle and on through the next one as well, if I don't get my BFP! I used a different brand later that day and didn't get a line at all. I was noticing that I was wet all day. Not EWCM just wetness. When I checked my cervix it was higher then it had been but not hard to get to. I took an HTP and got a BFN, not shocked. We BDed that night and I used the Zestica for the first time. Sex was hot, felt good with the lube but almost too wet I know DH finished because I was super wet and gooey after but it felt great in an erotic way. I stayed in bed for the rest of the night with my hips shifted up to up my chances ;)
CD7, Jan 14 2012: Jumped in the shower that morning and checked CM... EWCM. Super stretchy and LOADS of it. I had to google to make sure it wasn't just semen. From what I read, it was intact CM not from DH as sperm will not stretch like that. I think it's a good sign. I've never had EWCM like that before so FX!! My cervix was high high high, almost unable to get a good feel of it but when I did I noticed a big dimple in it. The opening was much bigger then it normally feels. Usually it's a tiny little dimple. I was wet for more or less the whole day.
CD8, Jan 15 2012: Another wet day. Not really too much to report. Had a tiny bit of EWCM in the morning. I read online that you can tell the difference between sperm and CM by putting it in water and the CM will ball up and drop to the bottom. Sure enough, it did. Crazy. I used an O test again and got a faint control line but no test line. I made sure we BDed again that night, again using the fertility lube. It's a nice wet lube, instead of the slickly oily stuff we had been using. I learned that the lube we had been using isn't very sperm friendly. Who would have thought! I've found that 4mls is way way too much. I've been drawing it into a 1CC syringe and inserting about half a CC instead. Discrete and easy. Last nights BD was FANTASTIC!! I hope that was sexy baby making sex cause it was great. I threw in a few new moves and he LOVED it!! I even got a thank you text this morning. I find that the idea of sex right now is a HUGE turn on. I haven't had to force myself to enjoy it and even super tired I was totally into it.
All of this leads me to today....CD9, Jan 16 2012
After a super hot sex weekend, the kind you have on vacation... It makes me wet just thinking about it!!! I'm exhausted, satisfied and hopeful. We did have a tiny conversation about having a baby the night he got home. He seems to be happy about it and asked if I wanted to start trying. I didn't really answer but I'm glad to know he's okay with it all. I'm excited.
Today I checked CM and nothing. I was dry dry. To the point that I didn't know of he had finished inside me or not. I didn't think he did. I asked and he assured me he did... Twice in fact. Lol. So I'm not sure why I was so dry today. I checked twice since my shower and it's dry! I mean it's not sandy desert dry but there's no EWCM anymore so I hope hope hope that I caught the big O in time. The small amount of CM I do have is watery and a bit creamy. I've read some posts on blogs and it seems that a lot of women have an abundant amount of CM after they get pregnant but some also say they were dry. Who knows. I'm not worried yet. I guess this might officially start my TWW! I imagine what a BFP would feel like and how I want to tell him and I have no idea yet. I guess I'll wait and see. I know that I won't be able to keep it a secret for long from him. I'll probably just blurt it out. :).
He may or may not go to work tonight so maybe I can sneak in another BD before he leaves ;)
PM update: Still dry. I have checked a few more times... Obsessive, I know. And Im wet, but not in a CM way. Its like a watery discharge. I have also noticed that I feel like Im drying out today. I cant get enoough water in me. I was on a transfer today and felt a quick sharp stabbing pain in my right flank/back area. It made me take a breath in... it was super sharp. I tried to move a bit to make it go away but it jusst sort of dissolved on me. I feel like Im getting a little bit crampy too. The last thing that I noticed was my lower back has started to be slightly sore. Not too bad, but its there and I noticed. Could be from lifting the fat dead guy today or it could be signs of better things to come! Lets hope the later.
So an update then:
CD6, Jan 13 2012: Watery CM, took an O test and got a faint faint line.. I have no idea if I caught it just after or if it was a fluke. I know they say it's not a positive until the two lines match or the one is darker then the test line but who knows. I get the nagging feeling that I do in fact ovulate early so we will see. I remember that on CD 9 last cycle I had chunky EWCM and didn't think anything of it because the calendar was telling me that I O on CD 12. We BDed a few times around then but no luck. Anyway the faint line confuses me. There's a picture on the bottom, can't really tell from the picture but the second one is a few days later after it dried. Faint line!! I have several tests still to use so I'll keep testing to see of I get a positive this cycle. I also plan to order O tests from online and keep testing through my cycle and on through the next one as well, if I don't get my BFP! I used a different brand later that day and didn't get a line at all. I was noticing that I was wet all day. Not EWCM just wetness. When I checked my cervix it was higher then it had been but not hard to get to. I took an HTP and got a BFN, not shocked. We BDed that night and I used the Zestica for the first time. Sex was hot, felt good with the lube but almost too wet I know DH finished because I was super wet and gooey after but it felt great in an erotic way. I stayed in bed for the rest of the night with my hips shifted up to up my chances ;)
CD7, Jan 14 2012: Jumped in the shower that morning and checked CM... EWCM. Super stretchy and LOADS of it. I had to google to make sure it wasn't just semen. From what I read, it was intact CM not from DH as sperm will not stretch like that. I think it's a good sign. I've never had EWCM like that before so FX!! My cervix was high high high, almost unable to get a good feel of it but when I did I noticed a big dimple in it. The opening was much bigger then it normally feels. Usually it's a tiny little dimple. I was wet for more or less the whole day.
CD8, Jan 15 2012: Another wet day. Not really too much to report. Had a tiny bit of EWCM in the morning. I read online that you can tell the difference between sperm and CM by putting it in water and the CM will ball up and drop to the bottom. Sure enough, it did. Crazy. I used an O test again and got a faint control line but no test line. I made sure we BDed again that night, again using the fertility lube. It's a nice wet lube, instead of the slickly oily stuff we had been using. I learned that the lube we had been using isn't very sperm friendly. Who would have thought! I've found that 4mls is way way too much. I've been drawing it into a 1CC syringe and inserting about half a CC instead. Discrete and easy. Last nights BD was FANTASTIC!! I hope that was sexy baby making sex cause it was great. I threw in a few new moves and he LOVED it!! I even got a thank you text this morning. I find that the idea of sex right now is a HUGE turn on. I haven't had to force myself to enjoy it and even super tired I was totally into it.
All of this leads me to today....CD9, Jan 16 2012
After a super hot sex weekend, the kind you have on vacation... It makes me wet just thinking about it!!! I'm exhausted, satisfied and hopeful. We did have a tiny conversation about having a baby the night he got home. He seems to be happy about it and asked if I wanted to start trying. I didn't really answer but I'm glad to know he's okay with it all. I'm excited.
Today I checked CM and nothing. I was dry dry. To the point that I didn't know of he had finished inside me or not. I didn't think he did. I asked and he assured me he did... Twice in fact. Lol. So I'm not sure why I was so dry today. I checked twice since my shower and it's dry! I mean it's not sandy desert dry but there's no EWCM anymore so I hope hope hope that I caught the big O in time. The small amount of CM I do have is watery and a bit creamy. I've read some posts on blogs and it seems that a lot of women have an abundant amount of CM after they get pregnant but some also say they were dry. Who knows. I'm not worried yet. I guess this might officially start my TWW! I imagine what a BFP would feel like and how I want to tell him and I have no idea yet. I guess I'll wait and see. I know that I won't be able to keep it a secret for long from him. I'll probably just blurt it out. :).
He may or may not go to work tonight so maybe I can sneak in another BD before he leaves ;)
PM update: Still dry. I have checked a few more times... Obsessive, I know. And Im wet, but not in a CM way. Its like a watery discharge. I have also noticed that I feel like Im drying out today. I cant get enoough water in me. I was on a transfer today and felt a quick sharp stabbing pain in my right flank/back area. It made me take a breath in... it was super sharp. I tried to move a bit to make it go away but it jusst sort of dissolved on me. I feel like Im getting a little bit crampy too. The last thing that I noticed was my lower back has started to be slightly sore. Not too bad, but its there and I noticed. Could be from lifting the fat dead guy today or it could be signs of better things to come! Lets hope the later.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
CD 5, 7 DTO, Jan 12 2012
I am an emotional nut case today. I have been for the last few days. I'm not sure why. It could be that my body is freaking out with all the hormones raging through me or it could be that that lovely depression is coming back to kick my ass. Or it could be that I'm ridiculously lonely and down about life today. I'm so tired of DH being away. I'm tired of being alone at home and bored and waiting for him to come home. I feel single. Its a shitty feeling.
Today sucked. I'm going to write this and I know that every single line of it is going to ooze doubt and its going to make us look like we aren't ready for anything more then going our separate ways, but I still feel in my heart that we are on the right track. We only seem to have issues when we are away from each other for too long.
So again, today sucked hard. I worked nights last night, which meant I got home tired and into an empty bed, which made me lonely. I realized that DH has been short with me since he left. I rechecked text messages and sure enough, I couldn't see a text for the last week where he told me he loved me or anything more then a generic "Morning". I panicked. Its rare that an I love you is not said from him. One of his best and my most favorite qualities about him is that he always tells me how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. It hurt to the bottom of my heart when I realized that he had stopped saying it. I talked to him briefly which didn't settle my mind anymore. I asked him why he stopped telling me he loved me and he was quiet for a very long time. It is still unsettling to me now. I'm trying to work through it and be rational but I worry. We have talked a bunch since that call this morning and I don't know that I can say that things are good, but they are defiantly better.. kinda. Its hard to explain with him. We have our issues but I don't feel like we will give up on one another. Not unless there is something that happens that we cant work through. I can only hope that things smooth out and we can work on making things better. I miss him. I miss who we used to be and what we had in the beginning.
I am going to make an effort to work on our relationship. I'm going to make an effort to spend some time together, without distractions of everyday life and I'm going to make an effort to be nice and loving. I need him and his love as much as I'm sure that he needs mine. I want to continue the TTC journey and work on us and our family all at the same time.
I took an O test and a PT tonight... Something about my moods told me I should check just in case!
A BFN on the PT and a BFN on the O test as well. The O test was a lighter control line and no positive line, while the PT was a strong instant control line with no positive line at all.
Today sucked. I'm going to write this and I know that every single line of it is going to ooze doubt and its going to make us look like we aren't ready for anything more then going our separate ways, but I still feel in my heart that we are on the right track. We only seem to have issues when we are away from each other for too long.
So again, today sucked hard. I worked nights last night, which meant I got home tired and into an empty bed, which made me lonely. I realized that DH has been short with me since he left. I rechecked text messages and sure enough, I couldn't see a text for the last week where he told me he loved me or anything more then a generic "Morning". I panicked. Its rare that an I love you is not said from him. One of his best and my most favorite qualities about him is that he always tells me how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. It hurt to the bottom of my heart when I realized that he had stopped saying it. I talked to him briefly which didn't settle my mind anymore. I asked him why he stopped telling me he loved me and he was quiet for a very long time. It is still unsettling to me now. I'm trying to work through it and be rational but I worry. We have talked a bunch since that call this morning and I don't know that I can say that things are good, but they are defiantly better.. kinda. Its hard to explain with him. We have our issues but I don't feel like we will give up on one another. Not unless there is something that happens that we cant work through. I can only hope that things smooth out and we can work on making things better. I miss him. I miss who we used to be and what we had in the beginning.
I am going to make an effort to work on our relationship. I'm going to make an effort to spend some time together, without distractions of everyday life and I'm going to make an effort to be nice and loving. I need him and his love as much as I'm sure that he needs mine. I want to continue the TTC journey and work on us and our family all at the same time.
I took an O test and a PT tonight... Something about my moods told me I should check just in case!
A BFN on the PT and a BFN on the O test as well. The O test was a lighter control line and no positive line, while the PT was a strong instant control line with no positive line at all.
CM @18:00 hrs: Sticky/medium firm/medium height
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
CD 4, 8 DTO, Jan 11 2012
Nothing too much to report today, Just wanting to get into the swing of making a post every day or a least every secind one on this journey.
DH and I had a little speed bump today. A past issue popped up today and I still feel hurt about it so its making things a bit more difficult about this choice. I know that Im making the right choice but at the same time I worry that Im being blind. Im trying to stay positive regardless. I have been thinking alot about how I handle things and how I always expect the worst out of everything and I am trying to change that. I am trying to see the good in things instead of always seeing the worst case.
DH and I had a little speed bump today. A past issue popped up today and I still feel hurt about it so its making things a bit more difficult about this choice. I know that Im making the right choice but at the same time I worry that Im being blind. Im trying to stay positive regardless. I have been thinking alot about how I handle things and how I always expect the worst out of everything and I am trying to change that. I am trying to see the good in things instead of always seeing the worst case.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Its Official!!
Officall cycle #1, Unoffically sneaky cycle #2 TTC
Cyce started: Jan 8th 2012 @ aprox 6:30am
Im currently CD 3 and 9 Days to O (I think)
BFN Jan 7th :(
We are offically going to start TTC!!
I guess I have been ready and sneaky about it since about April of last year. Honestly, I stopped taking my pills within the first two months of taking them. ;)
Sneaky, I know. But I have also been taking the steps to prevent it so far.
I sent SO a text last night asking what I would have to do to convince him to think about talking about a baby and he replied that it wouldnt take anything at all. He asked if I was ready to start trying!!! I know that we had talked about waiting till I was done school, but lets be realistic here.... Im 6 months away from 30 and I have been off and on the Depo shot for the last 6 years. Its going to take a hell of alot of adjusting to my life and body for anything to happen soon. I am finally getting regular cycles and Im on #4 since September (Finally). I went through a few months of no AF, then a month and a half of old AF like discharge before my body seemed to get straightened out. Ive been using an App on my phone to keep track of cycles and CM. Interesting little idea, the whole checking your cervix thing.
I have learned alot in the last year of checking my body, checking the internet and checking in books. LOL All on the sly, I think. OS hasnt said anything about it if he is wise to it all. I feel free to be able to actually talk to him about it now and I was excited to be able to mention it to April. She and I went to the Dollar Store and loaded up on O tests and BFT's. I felt like a total fool for getting tests there, but they are cheap and will give me an indication of when to use the good ones. At least thats what Im hoping for. I have been hunting down some PreSeed and managed to find some Zestica, which from what I gather is the same thing just different name. Everyone raves about it so Ill try it I guess. I have the nagging feeling that I will need the extra help and it probably wont happen on its own, but even if Im wrong, why not up the chances...Right??
I have everything I need to start out in this journey on a healthy note. I have started taking prenatal vitamins and Omega 3 suppliments. Im going to start temping as well, as I am super curious about getting all the imformation I can to do this successfully sooner rather then later. I have a whole crap load of tests of every kind and I have the sperm helper lube!!
Im excited to start trying.... to actually have a plan!
Cyce started: Jan 8th 2012 @ aprox 6:30am
Im currently CD 3 and 9 Days to O (I think)
BFN Jan 7th :(
We are offically going to start TTC!!
I guess I have been ready and sneaky about it since about April of last year. Honestly, I stopped taking my pills within the first two months of taking them. ;)
Sneaky, I know. But I have also been taking the steps to prevent it so far.
I sent SO a text last night asking what I would have to do to convince him to think about talking about a baby and he replied that it wouldnt take anything at all. He asked if I was ready to start trying!!! I know that we had talked about waiting till I was done school, but lets be realistic here.... Im 6 months away from 30 and I have been off and on the Depo shot for the last 6 years. Its going to take a hell of alot of adjusting to my life and body for anything to happen soon. I am finally getting regular cycles and Im on #4 since September (Finally). I went through a few months of no AF, then a month and a half of old AF like discharge before my body seemed to get straightened out. Ive been using an App on my phone to keep track of cycles and CM. Interesting little idea, the whole checking your cervix thing.
I have learned alot in the last year of checking my body, checking the internet and checking in books. LOL All on the sly, I think. OS hasnt said anything about it if he is wise to it all. I feel free to be able to actually talk to him about it now and I was excited to be able to mention it to April. She and I went to the Dollar Store and loaded up on O tests and BFT's. I felt like a total fool for getting tests there, but they are cheap and will give me an indication of when to use the good ones. At least thats what Im hoping for. I have been hunting down some PreSeed and managed to find some Zestica, which from what I gather is the same thing just different name. Everyone raves about it so Ill try it I guess. I have the nagging feeling that I will need the extra help and it probably wont happen on its own, but even if Im wrong, why not up the chances...Right??
I have everything I need to start out in this journey on a healthy note. I have started taking prenatal vitamins and Omega 3 suppliments. Im going to start temping as well, as I am super curious about getting all the imformation I can to do this successfully sooner rather then later. I have a whole crap load of tests of every kind and I have the sperm helper lube!!
Im excited to start trying.... to actually have a plan!
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