1 p.m.
Ive made it to one and no show of AF.
Its now 6 P.M.... nothing. Not a cramp or tint of blood at all.
7:11 P.M.
I cheated and peed on a test I snuck with me. What a frigging dissapointment!! - - - - - - - Or at least I think it was. I looked and looked and looked (which every test instruction paper says is a bad thing if you have to search) and then I had a little heart flutter.... IS IT THERE??
I took it and marked where I thought I saw a shadow of a line and then brought up a picture of someone else's positive so I could compare lines and WTH!! I actually marked it RIGHT where the line is/or should be if I had in fact imagined it. I cant see it now, cause DUH, I marked the line with red marker then realized that it would bleed into the tests line and make it more pink... a lie pink.
So I cut the tips off where I marked it. And now Im back to being skeptical.
GRRRRR!!!
Im reading all sorts of crap online about it being a fading positive which is actually a negative. That a positive should be + for at LEAST 48 hours and not fade out. I have no clue now. My BBs are still sore and huge. CM is wet with bits of creaminess. CP is still high and medium. I dont know what to think. Im tired today but I was up most of the night, so Im not taking that into account.
I keep thinking that Im starting to feel back pain and cramps like AF. Im so scared. I dont want to TTC for another month! I know we have just just started but still! I dont want to wait and I think that stupid + (or whatever the hell it was) has made me anxious and hopeful. I was already counting the days and how far I would be for different dates... Silly me. Im sure that AF will be here tonight or tommorow morning. :(
More tomorrow!
